


Veloci-Reaper

by wrsw



Category: Virtual Streamer Animated Characters
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Gen, Humor, Reincarnation, no beta we die like Kiara
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 09:29:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28990005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrsw/pseuds/wrsw
Summary: Kiara, through thousands of lives, had gotten used to dying, and the many ways one could pass on.That being said, being killed by the physical body of the grim reaper slamming into her at terminal velocity was new.
Relationships: Amane Kanata & Kiryuu Coco, Mori Calliope/Takanashi Kiara
Comments: 6
Kudos: 103





	Veloci-Reaper

**Author's Note:**

> I've been thinking about writing fanfiction of various fandoms for years and I finally actually go ahead because of hololive. The virtual youtuber rabbit hole has consumed every faucet of my life and I love it.
> 
> Headcanon: Kiara doesn't always reincarnate into a different world every time she dies, only sometimes.
> 
> (The actions of the characters in this story are not representative of the actual hololive talents, obviously.)
> 
> A NOTE ABOUT THE WORK: "These quotes" are used to represent English speech, and 「These quotes」 are used to represent Japanese speech.

Takanashi Kiara's current life was actually going pretty well, all things considered.

Not that she would say any of her lives were ever 'bad' - even on the life that was cut short a mere 42 seconds after reincarnating (1), she had to admit that it was actually pretty funny to have somehow thrown it all away that quickly, and there wasn't exactly much attachment to that particular life. She really didn't know what she wanted to do as of right now, but so far she had to admit this world had been pretty comfy.

While she did miss some of the more outright magical environments she had been reincarnated into - magical abilities did not appear to be common in this world - at the end of the day, modern technology had made life pretty overall comfy. Kiara was all too aware that she was going to end up missing a lot of it when she moved on to the next world; in particular, she would definitely miss the taste of good ol' fried chicken. She wasn't entirely sure how many times she'd die in this world before moving on to the next. While the fact that she was at zero deaths in the modern world so far was a promising sign, Kiara was far too aware of the fact that life could come to an end very suddenly.

And, in following that theme, while walking around the outskirts of Tokyo, she heard a shout.

"KUSO-"

And that was all she got before Mori Calliope, the grim reaper's apprentice, slammed into her from above at terminal velocity, immediately ending her current streak of being alive.

* * *

"Calli! I didn't know you were in Japan!"

Mori Calliope was certain that whatever multiverse cycle-of-life-and-death deity that was out there was screwing with her. Or that any presently-existing deity of luck was screwing with her. Or that fate itself was screwing with her. She'd run into Kiara _far_ too often, across her many, many lives, for it to be statistically probable by pure chance. Kiara, being her usual excitable self, had decided that she needed to immediate take Calliope out to a local café the instant she met her significant recurring other. Calliope, also being her usual actually-softhearted self, found herself unable to say no.

"Well, I've been busy, but honestly it's pretty cool getting into music production. That, and, well..."

Calliope went silent, trying to find any way to _not_ admit that she actually missed-

"You missed me?"

"Shut up, Kusotori. I didn't expect to see you in this world, anyway." _Technically true_ , Calliope mused, as she figured that this world's lack of magical influence would lower the chances for encountering Kiara once again. Fate apparently was having none of that, so it turned out Kiara was actually already there when Calliope was transferred to do modern-world reaping.

Kiara was _also_ having none of it.

"I mean, you say that, but somehow we keep running into each other over and over again. Honestly, you should keep a score card for how often we meet, because I keep forgetting you!"

She paused, then continued speaking.

"Though, really, I wasn't expecting you to take my first death in this world so directly. Usually you just show up to reap my soul after however I ended up being killed."

Calliope had no words. Kiara was just too positive to be shaken by the fact that she had just been killed, and despite having done this for thousands of years, Calliope still continued to be surprised at this.

Kiara, sensing an opportunity to keep going, decided to finally ask the question that presumably this story was leading up to: "So, why were you flying through the streets of Tokyo, anyway? Actually, why are you here at all? Normally reaper duty keeps you tied up in the underworld."

Mori Calliope, the apprentice of death itself, merely sighed.

"You're not gonna stop until I tell you why, so I guess I might as well say it out loud."

* * *

_Earlier..._

Being called up to the office of the actual boss of the afterlife was always a terrifying ordeal, regardless of who you were. As a former-mortal, it meant that your sins were about to be judged very strictly. As an immortal, it generally meant a world of hurt.

And as a permanent member of the underworld, such as Mori Calliope, in generally meant that her boss was not happy with her for one reason or another. She'd only been directly in this room once before, and recalling how it went the one time she did still made her admittedly slightly nervous (2).

So, to be called up again was not generally good news.

_Don't show it on your face. You aren't nervous. Nothing's going to go wrong._

Walking into the simple-yet-imposing office, she let out a breath, successfully avoiding cursing.

"So...um, why was I called up here?"

_God dammit Calliope that was too casual. Death isn't your friend._

A moment of silence rang throughout the office. This always happened, from what Calliope had heard from other reapers.

**You are being reassigned to a new world. One primarily without magic.**

This wasn't new; For whatever reason, Calliope had done reaping in more worlds than most other reapers. It was unusual, though, in that normally a messenger would suffice - the office wasn't usually required for matters such as this.

 **You are being called here for a special task. There is a being in this world that is not supposed to** **be. You are being assigned to her.**

With that, the cloaked figure known only to the reapers as 'Death' stepped out of the shadows. While doing so, he conjured a small floating fire. The fire them transformed into a ring, of which within was a clear-view of Calliope's current target: An angel with a blue streak in her hair.

Calliope decided to ask the obvious. "This doesn't look like a mortal being, especially not from a non-magical realm."

**This is Amane Kanata. She descended from the Heavenly realm, and is now wandering amongst mortals without the Heavens' leave.**

"And the heavens are just allowed to order you around? This doesn't seem like-"

**She has actively resisted the Heaven's will.**

"Ah, they tried the carrot, and now I'm the stick."

**I believe that is a human analogy that accurately summarizes the situation.**

"That still seems kind of hard, though - I'm strictly not allowed to mess around with the mortal realm; even her soul aside, she has a physical body. I can't do all that much about this without breaking a lot of rules."

**Then your form may adapt to the situation. All necessary permissions have been granted for the task.**

"Well, alright then."

**If the opportunity for discussion emerges, give her this letter.**

"What let-" Looking down, she sees a letter already somehow in her pocket, with no knowledge on how it got there.

* * *

"You were assigned to take Amane Kanata's life?!"

"Well, not so much take her life as remind her that she's supposed to live in Heaven. She's kind of breaking the rules by sticking around here. I was really hoping that she'd just run back up to Heaven when she saw there was a Shinigami after her. I've heard we're kind of scary."

Kiara just broke out laughing. Calliope just sighed.

"You don't count, you don't die when you're killed."

* * *

It was morning.

Rejoining the physical realm was always an experience. The sudden realization that she actually had physical nerves, and was capable of being physically interacted with, was always somewhat weird to her.

It wasn't an _entirely_ normal physical body. She really had been granted permission; despite being in a world that was theoretically mostly without magic, Calliope had access to many of her legitimate Shinigami powers. She could conjure her scythe, and physical distance really just wasn't a thing to her. In theory this job could be wrapped up in a few minutes, if everything went well.

Granted, that was a big if - she'd never ran into an angel before, but from she had heard they had the potential to be terrifyingly strong; one of the downsides with physically incarnating was that she could actually lose fights now. Kanata looked pretty unassuming, though, and Calliope figured it was 50/50 that Kanata would immediately give in once she realized that the heavens had sent a literal Shinigami after her. It was an overkill measure, but in general any organization that deals with the cycles of life and death didn't tend to screw around. Kanata would learn that lesson.

She looked at her smartphone, which had the location of her target.

_Room 1729. Here goes._

She looked up at the apartment building her target was staying at. Then her body _shifted_ , disappearing into smoke and reappearing on the inside.

The first thing she noticed was how much of a mess the room was. Everything was covered in dust that clearly had never been cleaned up properly at any point.

Hearing footsteps, she immediately turned around to face the speaker and currently assigned target.

Kanata, the angel, didn't strike Calliope as an intimidating figure back when she saw the conjured image of her in the underworld. Now that she was directly in front of her, three things was quite clear:

  1. Amane Kanata simply wasn't an imposing figure.
  2. Kanata had clearly given into mortal sins. In addition to her messy room full of mortal possessions, she even was wearing a ring on her finger, meaning she had most likely associated with those of the mortal realm.
  3. Kanata was still clearly half-asleep.



「Huh. What do you want?」

_Uh, what now? Wait, the letter._

Partially in desperation, she pulls the out the letter.

Kanata takes it, saying nothing, though reading the letter. It was only at this point that Kanata realized that Mori was really there. The reality of having a stranger in her room suddenly apparent to her, she raises her voice both in volume and in pitch.

「Wait, who are you?!」

It was at this moment that Calliope cursed the fact that, her Japanese was only barely good enough to conduct even basic speech with; she merely introduced herself:

「I'm Death's apprentice, Mori Calliope.」

「Uh...I enjoy this world! The heavenly realm can't take me back!」

Calliope might have not understood the words, but the intent was clear: Amane Kanata would need some slight amount of intimidation to be made to leave.

"Fuck, I was really hoping I didn't need to use this." And with that, she conjured her scythe into her hands.

Kanata pauses. 「That's the kind of English Kaichou uses...?」

_Wait, Kaichou? Okay, that's a title, who-_

And with a single punch, Mori Calliope was sent down to the floor.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?!"

Calliope was slightly disoriented by the first hit. "Oh, hey, another English speaker."

* * *

"You met Kiryu Coco?!"

"Wait...oh no, it's _that_ Kiryu Coco? The same one who literally-"

* * *

To her credit, Kanata actually sounded kind of terrified. 「She's a Shinigami! She's going to send me back to the heavenly realm!」

Coco, on the other hand, sounded confidently unfazed. 「Well, that's easy enough to deal with. Kana-tan, can you Grab her?」

Mori Calliope had only started getting up when suddenly, Amane Kanata, the unassuming and humble-looking angel, suddenly picked Calliope up off the floor and hoisted the Shinigami's body over her shoulder.

_Wait, what? And did this person just refer to the angel as "Kana-tan"? Does that mean they're friends-_

Calliope looked around with her limited range, and caught sight of her mysterious and English-speaking assailant. She immediately noticed the pair of horns and tail.

_Wait, that's a dragon._

"WHAT'S A DRAGON DOING HERE?!"

"Kana-tan is a good friend of mine. She lives here. And if she wants to keep living here, today that means one thing:"

It was at this point that Calliope realized three things:

  1. Amane Kanata wasn't an imposing figure, but her physical strength far, _far_ exceeded what her body looked like it could do.
  2. The task was impossible. Unless one of either Coco or Kanata physically kicked it, there was no way in hell she could drag Kanata back to the heavens.
  3. Kiryu Coco had just opened the apartment's window.



"Get out of here, motherfucker!"

And with that, Amane Kanata used her angelic magic - and that magic was entirely channeled into one thing and one thing only: throwing Mori Calliope directly through the open window as hard as possible.

* * *

"I wasn't warned that the angel was being guarded by _that_ F-wording Dragon!"

Kiara was busy laughing hysterically. Calliope sighed.

"And, well, you know how that ended."

"Yeah, but I'm really impressed by how far you flew - you got pretty much across the entirety of Tokyo there!"

* * *

Calliope had to admit that she was impressed by how fast she was going - she had truly underestimated the task at hand, and now she's paying a very physical price for it.

She looked ahead.

_Wait, is that Kiara?_

As she got closer, the distinctive appearance of the phoenix-in-human-form became clear. Calliope attempted to warn her.

"KUSO-"

And then she crashed into Kiara before finishing the second half of the word.

* * *

"Besides, it's not like it's the first time you've killed me. Remember that fight we had? The one where you killed me 42 seconds after I revived?"

Calliope sighed. She _did_ remember that. That had been before she had figured out that Kiara did not die when she was killed. Being able to reverse death repeatedly had driven Calliope nuts back then, as a young reaper (3).

Still drove her nuts today, if she was being honest; she had just gotten better at coping with that fact.

"Or...maybe you're just embarrassed that of all ways this is how we met in this world!"

Calliope wanted to shut Kiara up, but the issue was, she was entirely right, which is why her reaction to that comment was simply as such:

"Guh!"

At that point, Calliope received a phone call.

"Hang on, Kiara, let me take this call." She looked at the caller, and then cursed her boss, Death, for actually being up-to-date on modern technology, as it was his number. She answered, knowing this would go poorly.

"Mori Calliope speaking."

Death's voice managed to have a surprisingly intimidating timbre to it, despite being sent over a phone line.

**"You've been taken off the task. The heavens have informed me of a development that-"**

Mori Calliope had finally had enough of how completely stupid her day had been.

"If you mean _Kiryu f-wording Coco_ , then, yes, actually."

**"You know better than to talk back to Death."**

"Yeah, well fuck you too pal. Actually, wait, no, I don't actually-"

**"For that act of insubordination, I hereby declare your punishment: You will be forced to _live_ , indefinitely."**

"Ha! I'm..."

It dawned on Calliope at that moment, that, in fact, she was actually _in_ the mortal realm, and in a _entirely physical_ body. She knew exactly what that threat meant.

"...going to have to figure out how to live in an actual human body now, aren't I?"

**"Indeed. With the Kiryu Clan's appearance, Heaven's administrators declared her a lost cause that we can only merely wait out. Your punishment for both your failure to complete your duty as a reaper and for your attitude towards your superior will be to live in this world, in a physical body, until Amane Kanata returns to the heavenly realm, whenever she decides to return."**

And with that, Death hung up.

"GUH!"

Kiara replied a bit _too_ cheerfully. "Well, actually, I can think of a plan."

"Kiara, how much of my boss' side of that did you hear?"

"Enough to know that you're stuck here with the rest of us!

It was at this point that Mori Calliope realized there would be no saving any sense of personal dignity she managed to keep this far.

Kiara either didn't notice or didn't care about Calliope's creeping personal despair. "Actually, you know, we don't get to hang out for very long - usually you're too busy not having an actual body to you know, live together, and I'm too busy reincarnating again. But, you know, if Kanata sticks around, then maybe..."

"Oh, no. Nononononononono..."

"Then maybe you could become MY WIFE! Like, for real this time!"

"KUSOTORI!"

* * *

Omake:

Calliope seemed mostly confused. "So, wait, this 'hololive' is a multi-dimensional idol group? And now we're set to debut as part of its new EN branch?"

Kiara, on the other hand, seemed excited beyond all belief. "Yes! My favourite idol is Pekora-senpai, who's from the magical country of Pekoland."

_Maybe she'll make Pekora her wife instead...?_

Kiara, being rather excitable, kept going. "Though, really, we have to thank Coco-senpai for encouraging hololive to start an EN branch."

"Sure, I'll-wait, Coco? As in, _that_ Coco? As in, Kiryu Co-"

"Good morning motherfuckers."

_Dear Death. Why did you make my body physically immortal._

Calliope paled. Kiara smiled.

"Don't worry, Calli. If hololive forgave Coco-senpai for crashing into their office in dragon form, I'm sure they'll forgive your for threatening Kanata-senpai."

**Author's Note:**

> (1): She's pretty sure that's where her death% no suicide category RTA PB stands, but after dying a few thousand times, admittedly the time might be off by a few seconds.
> 
> (2): In a panic, she challenged Death to a game of chess as a method to stall for time. As it turns out, unlike Calli, Death was an international master who was actually terrifyingly good at the game, and challenging them as a beginner was a total mistake - On the flipside, she did learn what the term 'Scholar's Mate' means.
> 
> (3): Well, actually, an eternal reaper who had liven far longer than any mortal being ever could, but when you measure your lifespan in eras, you tend to mature slowly.


End file.
